remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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