is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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