we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I forgot wine drunk hurts
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
