its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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