I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
