3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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