I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
