I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
