you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
