So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
