We won't sleep together?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Randomize
