I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
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