My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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