need another drink. this is the easiest way
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
