I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
