you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
