I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
