smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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