life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
