I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
