I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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