Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
