dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
