You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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