Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
wow bdsm is so cute
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
