so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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