I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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