mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
