its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Randomize