these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
