Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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