I wish i was in the wii world.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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