I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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