dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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