Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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