i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
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