chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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