My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
