I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
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