My hand turned me down
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
