yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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