Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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