I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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