wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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