I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
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