That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize
