I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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