any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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