worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
