I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
