if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Randomize
