i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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